Noticing
November 2026: Savouring
Dear Readers,
It feels a bit odd to be writing the November post before mid October but my tech support is available now, so with my stubborn unwillingness to learn how to do this myself, this is a small price to pay!
As I sit on my couch to write this, I am looking out at our maple tree and it is bright orange and russet now. We are one or two big wind storms from calling the landscaper to come in for the fall clean up. The sprinklers have been turned off. It won’t be long before the hydrangeas all get brutally cut back along with the callas revealing my stone ghost lanterns that all but disappear except in fall and winter. When the plants die back or are pruned back, it is time for the garden sculptures and large ornamental boulders to be on show and provide a different kind of austere and simple show.
The seasonal changing of the guard helps me to reflect on my own changing and aging into what is now undeniably the bittersweet winter of my life.
I notice myself enjoying a slower, deliberate and more intentional pace to my days. I do not hesitate to say no to anything that interferes with the pace and cadence to a day that I enjoy. I often look at my week ahead and ask what I can opt out of so that I can opt into more of what I enjoy. I say “no” way more often than I say “yes”. In fact, I hardly say yes anymore unless in my heart it feels like a “hell yes!” I realize that being able to say that is a position of great privilege that I do not take lightly.
I have been doing a lot of what some would call “work” but that I deeply enjoy mulling the mysteries of our existence on this earth. I find that so much of being human is recognizing when our ego is speaking and acting out vs the very best and authentic parts of us.
To do so requires a lot of silence, space, and practicing the pause. We must put aside the very human need to understand and categorize everything. To embrace the liminal space. To become more comfortable with the shifting ground beneath us. Seek out and savour the goodness already in our lives.
I’ve recently learned that Americans are addicted to a strong and loud point of view, even if it is flawed. They will choose that over the discomfort of not knowing or staying open minded. This perhaps explains a lot of where we find ourselves today as a nation.
I spent four days away in October at Invitas run by the poet and philosopher, David Whyte. The workshop titled Conversational Leadership is divided into three consecutive workshops spread out in October, February and June. I was shocked at how far so many participants had travelled from. Denmark, England, Tasmania. I was also ignorant of what an almost cult-like following David has. While I was familiar with his poetry, it takes a lot for me to be too taken with anyone. I went to challenge my own life routines and choices I have made and have yet to make. I wanted to learn a reliable philosophical process or filter to test my thoughts and routines through. He is also a huge fan of journaling so we were simpatico there. It really is such a powerful life tool. I highly recommend it. More on journaling further below.
I knew I was in the right place when we were given our very first assignment which was to consider the following questions:
What do I make space for in my life?
What do I avoid?
What is my relationship with the unknown and unknowable?
How comfortable am I with not knowing?
What edge does this bring out in me?
What am I afraid of?
What is my relationship with Mystery?
What is the question you are avoiding?
What conversation are you tired of having?
The questions only got deeper, juicier and more poignant from there. I am really glad I carved out time for it and will do so again for sessions two and three.
It reminded me of Dr. John McGee at the University of Puget Sound who taught philosophy. Did you know I wanted to be a Philosophy and Art History Major? I was shot down by my practical dad who suggested business or pre-law if he was footing the bill. Back to Dr. McGee, he assigned us a book called Art and Human Values. I was enthralled. I have never been so academically captured and smitten by anything before or after. They say that our 60s and beyond are a returning back to find our true selves. I definitely feel that strongly. I’ve been asking myself who was I before the world told me no?
Another word/concept that I have been leaning into is: SAVOURING.
I read this in Intelligence Weekly that got me thinking:
Psychologists use savoring to describe our capacity to notice, appreciate, and deepen positive experiences. I love the word because it feels different from gratitude. Gratitude can sometimes feel like looking at your life and making an inventory of what’s good. Savoring asks you to stay there for a moment.
We understand this instinctively with taste. A delicious meal is wasted if you swallow it without noticing. But an afternoon can be swallowed whole, too. So can a conversation, a summer, a period when everybody you love happens to be healthy, the funny story your partner tells you in bed, the age your child is right now, or the walk home when the air feels perfectly crisp.
Savoring is refusing to move on so quickly. Not asking life for another good thing and, instead, letting this one be enough for another minute.
Did you know that a moment can be enjoyed three times: before it happens, while it’s happening, and afterward?
Before: anticipation
The dinner is on Friday, but there is pleasure in thinking about it on Wednesday. The trip lasts four days, but part of it happens while choosing the hotel, sending places to each other, and wondering what the mornings there will feel like.
During: the actual experience
This is the part we can be strangely bad at. Why? Because we’re taking the picture, checking the next place with our attention turned to Google Maps, or already thinking about tomorrow. Sometimes savoring the present is catching yourself halfway through a very good moment and thinking: “Oh, I am so happy right now!”
After: reminiscence
Retelling the story, trimming videos from your trip into a reel, cooking the dish you ate there, talking about that fun and spontaneous night again three years later. A good thing doesn’t disappear because it ended. One experience can leave a long trail of pleasure behind it.
I am going to be more mindful moving forward and be sure that I am savouring all three stages of a good thing.
I love to end these blogs with the things that catch my eye, but in the spirit of savouring here are some things I am taking the time to truly appreciate and savour the joy it brings me.
If you know me at all, you know that I love a beautifully styled interior. When I was in grade school in Japan, Saturday mornings meant two, dubbed, t.v. shows I loved: Around The World, a travel show sponsored by PanAm Airlines. I am convinced it had the majority of girls then wanting to become air stewardesses. But not me. I was more influenced by Else Klench’s show Style. She would take us through the homes designed by famous interior designers. A precursor to a show like Homeworthy that we get on YouTube now. Else would open my eyes to the various styles of interiors that were lived in by the rich and famous. I learned quickly all the various styles and appreciated all the unique ways to live. It must have influenced my going into real estate which pre-dated staging and you could see how so many people chose to actually live and maximize their spaces.
Two homes that caught my eye while recently scrolling. Julianne Moore’s NYC apartment with its many terraces. And the home of Chrissie Rucker, the founder of The White Company. I still get so excited when I see a well executed interior.
FOOD
Here are three great fall dishes I found on Susan Spungen’s Substack you might enjoy. (She worked for Martha Stewart Living for an eternity).
This one-pot meal is truly easy. There’s minimal knife work, and then the rest of the time it’s a pretty hands-off affair—and the result is way tastier than it has any right to be considering the rather short ingredient list. It’s perfect for a family dinner but fancy enough for a casual dinner party!
The star of this recipe is the quinoa crunch, which elevates simple roasted squash to a whole new level. The salad is lovely with burrata, but you could also use stracciatella, fresh goat cheese, or buffalo mozzarella.
There’s nothing cozier than a roast chicken dinner, and this adaptation of the iconic dish from San Francisco’s Zuni Café is a forever favorite in our house. The best part of this dish is the bread salad that comes with the chicken and mops up all the juices.
TRAVEL
I think fall is the best time to travel. Students are back in school, the record high temps are a thing of the past, foliage is amazing in many parts and it just feels most civilized! Add fall and food and then you can count me in!
MUSIC
I am always a sucker for choir music. These young ladies did not disappoint: Danish Girl’s Choir.
I just read about this artist, Celeste and want to explore her work
I have been working making things happen vs wishing things were different? Have you heard of situational positioning? That is the concept of where you put yourself and the five people you interact most with in your life, influence you greatly. Heidi Hurst at W Abode just told me that Angela Duckworth who wrote Grit just released a new book on this called Situated that is arriving for me tomorrow. Have you noticed where you are and who you are with when you are your best self? Perhaps you might want to visit the book and consider how and with whom you situate yourself the majority of the time.
I took action on this a few months ago and started my journaling dinner club and called it a Circle of Six. I specifically chose five other women that I wanted to get to know better who I respected and would commit to the time. We work closely with Wilde House Paper and follow their word of the month to concentrate on. If you are looking for a journal for 2027, I strongly recommend their Intentional Planner! Megan Heddinger, the founder, puts her heart and soul into these and it shows.They are sublime.
Don’t sit around wishing something were so. If you feel strongly about something, chances are others do too. As long as what you are creating is positive and life enhancing, make it happen! You CAN do it! If you want to start your own and want to chat, I am happy to help! I am all for helping you situate yourself for the best outcome with your best people.
If you want a sneak peak of next year’s blog art, check out Anna Brones’ website. Her 2027 calendars are on her site now!
Thank you for reading. Thank you for encouraging your friends to subscribe. It is all deeply meaningful to me. I love hearing from you on what resonated or what rang hollow for you. Constructive feedback is always welcome. I am grateful for it.
XOXO,
Coach Diane
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All artwork for 2026 is by Seattle artist, Anna Brones.
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